perfect starry nights. sweet dreams. moon beams. a love that's warm. and bright.

My email address is brdbrain8, created in June 2002.

Because B, R, and D were all I could ever think about. My brain is all for B, R, and D.

Later, brain8 will also stand for B(2), R(2), A, I, and N. Plus 8 other names.

These letters represent most of my crushes. Ang cool, noh?

I will tell you about B.

B is actually Brandon Boyd. In 1997, when Incubus was but an obscure band, I heard Anti-Gravity over at the only radio station I knew at the time, NU107. Then I knew they'd be playing a major role in my life. I blame Drive (though I absolutely adore that song) for their selling-out (I had issues with selling out when I was young; I didn't like to share my music) and for a time, after Drive's EP debut, I hated the thought of girls liking Incubus, which will ultimately lead to them liking Brandon Boyd.

Alas, my love for their music cannot be quenched when I suddenly found myself 'joining the bandwagon' of screaming fangirls. I hated being uso, but what can I do, with all my fifteen years, I really loved Brandon Boyd. So for the record, I wasn't into the fad, just so we're clear on that.

I became so obsessed with wanting to be Mrs. Boyd that I carried the name to college, where I suppose I can be whoever I want to be. Hehehe. I followed the band's success stories and even watched Morning View Session over and over (I wonder where my CD went) until I could draw Brandon's tattoo in his right arm, which I successfully did. I took that with me all the time in freshmen year to inspire me. I even wanted to have the artwork on my arm, sira na talaga ulo ko.

I cried when other girls pledged their love for him because I knew they liked B for superficial reasons. It's so frustrating when I can't even discuss his poetry with all the other fangirls. Oh well. I even almost had a copy of White Fluffy Clouds but my cousin forgot to buy it when he was in the States.

Today, I forget all the details I had on B, except his birthday, which I celebrate until now. All the hours spent on drooling over B is but kept away in a little drawer in my memory. I sometimes think I have outgrown him. Sometimes, I do not want to think about his band and label them most negatively only because others found out about them.

They were in the Philippines almost five years ago; I would have seen them if it weren't for NSTP. It's a long tragic story. On the Saturday after their concert, I went to (then) Westin Philippine Plaza to follow their footsteps and I cried. My parents thought I was crazy. Maybe I was. Then I gave up on liking them altogether because I was an epic failure as a fan.

Why am I writing about it now? Anti-Gravity was also called Summer Romance. It's that season again when my little drawers go a-flutter so I can get a glimpse of how it was summers past.

Aaaand I just feel like telling you about B. Then I'd go on with R and D. Teehee.